SPY KIDS

What ever happened to Robert Rodriguez? You may remember him as the promising filmmaker who 10 years ago whipped together the hip, low-budget thriller El Mariachi. Since then he’s produced the dismal Four Rooms and The Faculty and now this ill-conceived kiddie spy romp. And what happened to Antonio Banderas, Rodriguez’s star from Desperado, who shares in this debacle?

Banderas and Carla Gugino are superspies who have ceased their world-hopping ways to raise a family but still keep a hand in the game as “consultants.” Their children (Baby Gappers Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara) draw them back to the front line when it’s discovered that a Saturday-morning TV show is actually a front to take over the world. The playhouse FX are appetizing, as is the charismatic cast, but the plot, much like a Punch and Judy sideshow, is concerned more with gadgetry than with such re nements as character development. Providing too little comic relief is Alan Cumming (Eyes Wide Shut), who’s a devilish delight as the Pee-wee-Herman-esque TV-show host, and Tony Shalhoub, who humps about as an unassuming mad scientist concocting an army of thumbs.

— Tom Meek