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Table of contents for week of July 23, 2004

NEWS & FEATURES

Tony Giampetruzzi describes how the pet care business is booming in Portland, and all because pet owners are crazy and treat their animals like damn children. The opinions expressed on this What's New page, by the way, are solely those of their author and not of the Phoenix Media/Communications Group, who unreservedly love and respect all pet owners, no matter how insane they may be.

On the eve of the Democratic National Convention, Barry Crimmins offers a totally unbiased, non-partisan open letter to John Kerry.

Tamara Wieder chats with political columnist Molly Ivins, whose new Who Let the Dogs In? compiles more than a hundred of her observations on American politics. But she's not old enough for it to be a career retrospective. No sir.

The award for best line of the week goes to Shay Stewart-Bouley, who writes: "I sometimes feel like we’re the Leave It to Beaver state that’s trying to get a Jetsons world to take it seriously." But wait, there's more!

Through the magic of telepathy, Chris Wright takes us into the mind of John Kerry. Just remember, anyone who looks into the abyss too long will eventually find the abyss looking back at him.

Plus, this just in:
OUR FAIR CITY: Portland’s Best and the rest
OUR FAIR CITY 2: Radical and otherwise

Politics and Other Mistakes
Bramhall Square
Letters to the editor
Savage Love
Crossword solution


MUSIC

If you're feeling down, nothing's better than angry music made with the intent to bring you even further down. Sam Pfeifle reviews the cheery ditties of Unscarred and Company Anthem.

Kids, get ready for the musical event of the summer: the Kneisel Hall Chamber Music Festival! Make sure to leave enough time to get wasted in the parking lot before the show begins. By Becca Dewan.

So much for homeland security - US forces have somehow failed to repel the Swedish invasion, as the Hives and Sahara Hotnights breach our shores. By Carly Carioli.

Plus, Sibilance.

Also, short reviews of:
Nick Curran and the Nitelifes: PLAYER!
Jon Langford: ALL THE FAME OF LOFTY DEEDS
Johnny Winter: I’M A BLUES MAN
The A.K.A.s: WHITE DOVES & SMOKING GUNS
Wolfgang Sawallisch, Philadelphia Orchestra: SCHUMANN: THE FOUR SYMPHONIES
Various Artists: BUZZIN’ FLY VOLUME ONE
Various Artists: TRAX RECORDS: 20th ANNIVERSARY COLLECTION

FILM

Matt Damon returns as unstoppable assassin Jason Bourne in The Bourne Supremacy. Peter Keough returns as hard-boiled film critic in this review.

Short reviews of:
I, ROBOT


THEATER

One of Shakespeare's greatest cross-dressing comedies, Twelfth Night, is playing at the Stage at Spring Point. Megan Grumbling has all the info you need to ignore the following tangent: Why is it that Shakespeare, who prominently features dudes in drag in at least half his plays, is considered the greatest literary mind of all time, but the people responsible for films like Sorority Boys and White Chicks should be cast into a pit of fire? We'll file that under, "Things that make you go 'Hmm.'"

DANCE

Worth the trip:
The New Danish Dance Theatre at Jacob's Pillow

ART

This weekend, the Bates College Museum of Art and the Bowdoin College Museum of Art will host an invitation-only conference dedicated to issues facing curators of contemporary art. There will be a designated "Free Speech Zone" fifty yards away. By Chris Thompson.

BOOKS

Alex Irvine brings some much needed sass to the genre of poetry criticism in discussing Betsy Sholl's Late Psalm. Highlight: "Sholl avoids the trap of getting all de Saussurean on the reader, trying to make some argument about signs." You tell it, sister!

In his new book, Thomas Frank wonders What's the Matter with Kansas? No, it's not about the Chiefs' stunning collapse in last year's AFC playoffs. By Catherine Tumber.

TELEVISION

Steve Vineberg says Bob Hoskins's performance is reason alone to buy the new DVD release of the BBC's Pennies from Heaven. Hard to believe that's the same Bob Hoskins who willingly torpedoed his entire career by agreeing to play the lead role in Super Mario Brothers: The Movie.

SPECIALS

Best Music Poll 2004
The Best of 2003
Portland Band Guide










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